Hamster-based-crime vs Human-based-crime

Apparently a large family here in the BK has some trouble with hamster-proximal anger management.

Tuesday night at 7, after a nine-month hunt for a suspect they described as evasive and uncooperative, law enforcement agents from the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals arrested Monique Smith, 19, along Knickerbocker Avenue in Bushwick.

Ms. Smith, in a fit of rage, threw her little brother’s hamster on the floor and killed it…and they took 9 months to track her down to prosecute the crime. Said hamster was one of 3 replacement hamsters her 25-year-old brother bought to replace the one he killed in a fit of rage. The family has no plans to get more hamsters because one of their cats just had kittens.

I believe I am on record as a friend to hamsters. Tina Fey and Amy Poehler lived lengthy, happy hamster lives with me until Tina Fey’s untimely demise. I don’t think people should be allowed to kill them.


In 2007 there were 9,082 unsolved murders of actual human beings dating back 1985 in Brooklyn alone.

Just saying.

Also, WTF Cleveland, Texas, population of normal people: unknown, population of victim blamers: at least 5, several of them close personal friends of New York Times writer James C. McKinley Jr. Allegedly. In case you didn’t hear about this heinous case and this wretched coverage of it, here’s how it could have been covered, and what educating young men and boys about sexual assault could have done to prevent it.

No 11-year-old child can consent to sex. Every single boy or young man in that room CHOSE to commit sexual assault, and CHOSE to record it on cell phones and CHOSE to disseminate it to their small town.

I understand, as a community member, being resistant to cast the first stone. I understand, as a reporter, interviewing family and friends of the attackers rather than the victim – they’re more likely to speak to you seeing as their kid isn’t the one who experienced a sever trauma. But I do not understand the impulse to turn responsibility for a disgusting, repulsive act of sexual violence around on an eleven-year-old. I don’t care how she dressed, where it took place or whether she’d ever been there before. And neither should James C McKinley Jr.

Sign a petition and tell the NY Times so.

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