It’s October, and you know what that means…

A) No baseball whatsoever, I don’t know what everyone’s so excited about.. …

B) MKP’s Mandatory Malaise…. which today I tried to get out of by going for a bike ride. To Greenwood Cemetery. You know, to cheer up. But it closed at 5, apparently, so I rode along it on 5th avenue and looked longingly at all the headstones….took some neato pictures with my bought-in-a-late-night-frenzy post-payday and post-retail shift camera…. and rode back.

C) A list. Of stuff I will never do (some of it again, some for the first time) in a retail climate.

1) Arrive <20 minutes before closing and stay….after the music is off, after the doors have shut, after the staff has stopped smiling….just…stay

2) Walk in on a cell phone and ambling aimlessly…stopping frequently…or never… totally lacking awareness of the employees with piles of dishes or cups or forks….. 

3)  Ask the people working the door what kind of store it is. Especially when the store, featuring large windows and a double-door that is open, has no secretive hallways or cabinets but rather displays EXACTLY what it sells

4) Get super pushy with employees over what was or was not made in China. Take "no" for an answer without asking several contradictory questions in a row. 

5) Take folded things and leave them a crumpled mess FOR NO REASON. I know everyone has seen a t-shirt before. I refuse to believe anyone was baffled by a 2-T toddler-size shirt. You just left it over there on top of the forks because you’re a jerk. 

And the moral of the story is…working 2 jobs is hard, people suck sometimes, but I really like retail and I really like being on the production end of the publishing equation…so I’ve just got to hang in there.

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